An Alcoholic Husband – How To Live?
Living with an alcoholic is like a game of appearances. From the outside, the family looks normal. It is even possible that the wife and husband are successful at work and their children learn very well. Showing a good face to the world often has the other, dark and scary side. Women who struggle with their husband’s addiction, try to keep up appearances and create the illusion of a good home, covering everything that is bad in the relationship with a sticky smile, explaining every bad decision with a momentary mistake and they are sure that it will be quickly repaired. Such a life, however, is a path to many misfortunes.
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Everyday Life Alongside The Alcoholic
People with alcohol dependence may drink on a daily basis or in certain phases, but they may come unexpectedly, wreaking havoc and havoc on their daily lives. Suddenly, you can’t invite your friends to your home because you are undergoing a small renovation or you fell down the stairs. Everyday life alongside the alcoholic turns into a rising tide of dissatisfaction and fear. Wives may find it difficult to meet their needs, be overburdened with responsibilities and play the role of two parents at the same time. Symptoms of wife codependency include overprotection, guilt, low self-esteem, worry, and anxiety. In such relationships, problems in the intimate sphere are also often diagnosed. Moreover, people lie to the environment and hide the truth. Alcoholic wives live in the fumes of beer or vodka, but they are good at characterizing and hiding it even from their immediate surroundings.
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People who are in a relationship with an addicted person develop a system of adaptive behaviors, thanks to which they relatively cope with everyday duties. Co-addiction syndrome develops in relationships where one alcohol abusing person destroys the relationship. It should be remembered that co-addiction does not only concern the wife of an alcoholic, but often also children who develop ACA (Adult Children of Alcoholics) syndrome from an early age.
What is Codependency?
Co-addiction syndrome is a disorder which, although it consists in adapting to a difficult life situation, effectively destroys good patterns and leads to the perpetuation of destructive behavior. Codependency is a way of functioning and reacting to changes in the behavior of a partner or a parent. Although a co-addicted person does not drink, he or she is subordinated to the behavior of the alcoholic husband or father. The world of a co-addicted woman or children revolves around bottles, sleepless nights and quarrels. Codependency is constantly balancing on the verge of fear and anxiety.
Alcoholism in the Family – How To Help An Addicted Person?
Specialists emphasize that at least one alcoholic in the family is enough, and we can talk about an alcoholic disease of the whole family. Although children are usually the most affected in this situation, the alcoholic’s wife is also in a very difficult situation. It has to provide children with safety, learning conditions and financial resources. However, the perceived stress has a very negative effect on her health, so she should be provided with adequate support.
In the event that an addict becomes dangerous, it is worth considering cutting yourself off from them and thus providing yourself and your children with a safe space. Often, such a solution is not only the best for the family, but also for the addict himself, who may better see the negative impact of alcohol abuse on his entire environment and himself.
What To Do When There Is Violence?
There are many types of violence. Domestic violence can be physical, psychological, and economic. Each of them leaves a mark on the psyche of people living with an addicted person. When it comes to even the slightest manifestation of violence, we must not remain silent. You have to seek help, and quickly. Alcoholism in the family brings many misfortunes, so you need to act. An alcoholic’s wife should act resolutely, caring for herself and her children above all else. The best choice will be to contact an addiction treatment center, where a person suffering from alcoholism will receive the necessary help. The alcohol problem is nothing to be ashamed of, every person seeking help shows great strength and should be proud of it. It’s not a shame to seek help!